Farewell

 With the change of seasons

I hope you will forgive me

Forget all our hurtful memories

And find all the infinite reasons

To smile and be happy

And find again what love is

I am always yours and always will be

At least a part of me

Astrologically in Love

~ By Lucky

People look at the stars to find their perfect mate, that perfect soul mate. I wish life was that simple, I really do. But stars just burn, they only consummate hydrogen atoms to the point of dustism where they can be one of us. May be it’s the reason why we turn to stars to tell us which one of us was made out of the same star so that we can be one again. But life isn’t that simple, seriously. Most us of have been searching for that soul mate our entire lives. Many have found lots of mates too. But I doubt if any of us has ever really found that perfect soul mate, not even in stories or fairy tales or myths. Romeo and Juliet were just hormone studded youths unable to stand through harshness of life, Radha wasn’t even among the 16000+ girls that Krishna scored with, Sati would rather burn herself than face Shiva, and Adam was more comfortable facing God’s wrath than his ‘soul’ mate’s. Many are bred to believe that one day prince charming will come and sweep them right off the floor, that a princess is waiting for them in a tower, that true love’s kiss will fix everything, even bring back the dead, brainwashed to believe that a 6 packed handsome will spray his flute and a bikini blonde will come crashing from the sky. Dreams are manufactured in our heads and sold back to us only to be the fastest selling product of all times. Fairness creams are presented by a ‘white’ Priyanka Chopra, anti-ageing creams are sold through ‘glowing’ Kajol, and apparently Google pays you $374 per hour without any catch at all. It is all so clear yet we can’t see. Kardashians are renowned for their innocence and Mayawati will probably be mourned for all her ‘selfless’ deeds. We are so easily threatened by the mass that we only accelerate its gravity. Love for our love is fuelled just like the love for our god, out of depression, repression, fear and compulsion. When life showers us with uncertainty, we seek shelter in the shield of love. And what can be a better shield than the one forged through celestial geometry and heavenly algorithms. We so easily believe that godly calculations will get us through the ups and downs of life, that matching birth dates will smoothen the gravels of life. And as I write this, the ‘modern’ atheist will so easily be judgemental. The point is not if we have stopped chaining ourselves to the wheels of tradition, if we have started to touch beyond names or colors but if we have stopped chaining ourselves to the whims of the masses, gluing ourselves to their FREEFALL. Free because masses do not make any resistance to their fall. They will just fall wherever gravity pulls and keep falling until they are one with the rock bottom and still keep falling. The efforts of individual particles are never enough to get the rock flying. Nevertheless, they keep trying, frictioned from edge to edge, they keep burning until they turn to pure energy and elevate. (Reference to foreign figures have been made to avoid any possible confrontation with National Politics) 

hairs like lovers.

heartbroken..when your beloved hair falls for the barber's scissors. all those moments when they ran down your forehead just to kiss your eyelashes, hugged tight to your temple, tickled your ears, made you feel the marvel of wind, everything falls apart.. memories mean nothing to these beauties as they are always keen to be dazzled by the sharp edges of those two faced scissors.. as they drift down your mountain of expressions, they tell you that you two no longer belong to each other, you two can never be together anymore.. you can do nothing but wait in life to find another love..wait for the new ones to grow..

he.

(it is about sb who is .. let us say 'lost' to sum it up. it's like he is dead, for himself.. no redemption could ever make his boat float again)

weird dream. they were all on the other side of stream. he was standing in between. he wouldn't move. water bounced off his denim clad shin but he couldn't move, he couldn't be moved. i couldn't see his face for i was behind him, on the other bank. no pebbles jolting down the way could scour his stand, his tainted sand underneath. his expressions were lost amidst the flowing reflections. he was lost with all others still staring at him and no one to push him off that clogged ground he was stuck in. i couldn't let him flow along the stream, others wouldn't let him flow along the stream. others sat, genuinely, to stare at him dissolve along time. but i felt somehow, he just waited for a hand to reach him, a shove to propel him to the land. when now i wake up i realize, he was just waiting for a big flood to sweep in and embrace him away with it...

sweet dreams.

dreams fall like nuts from wicked tree
a crone vaults off on spiked broom
burnt faces knock glass-pane to see
a poltergeist dance in your room
pigs snore in seething oil
leeches creep as shadows loom
blankets turn to burying soil
specters haunt to cheer your doom

what do you get from life?

ppl die. a friend of my brother died a few days ago. today we are here, tomorrow we're not. i'm not. u're not. what do u get from life?
i just got a mail from a friend abroad, i get a picture of her new born child.

PARTY GIRL

she was sittin by the fireplace
lookin beauty in her soft pink dress
she looked brighter than the wooden flame
and i just wanted to know her name.
i was 20 she was 23
cudnt stop staring at her glee
she happened to be my sister's fren
and i fell in true love once again..

a thought then just hit my head
what mirror had to say ‘bout u
what flaws in me that I had
cud never introduce to u
she must have a boyfren
i was just another kid in the block
curly hair and braces
i knew i was out of luck..

she was all beautiful and yap yap
just woke after drunken nap
am having many guesses
but now i just can't remember her face... -_-

Love Comes Strangely

A ray of hope in lantern beam
rain subdues the tainted scream
flurry of thoughts collide to form
a touch so strange to conscious whim
Moments splatter in heartbeat race
tears to varnish a swollen face
wind quietens for taciturns
two lovers heat cold in patience.

CLOSURE.

the denial
shun
even the sun is tired of tanning you
wind can no more carry your sweat
all that twinkles
you smile and face wrinkles
dab some dreams in the crinkles of clouds
an organic body to let the soul sprout
just waiting for the 22 million carats of diamond being formed in the sky.

..

sometimes you have to fall into a ditch to avoid falling from a cliff.

i had a beautiful dream.

A ship sailed. Till now i didn't know that i had a heart. There goes a happy man, there goes a sad man, both smiling..Ocean wind don't wait, waves cannot stop from hitting a cracked rock. Sunset and stars look good in the horizon, it is where the heaven melts and you dream..

I had a beautiful dream. You were on the other side of the pond. The water on my side was a bit green but it was clear on your side. I saw a chrysalis emerging from under the pond on my shallow side. I was excited to see the pupa turning into a butterfly underneath my blurry green pond. You wanted to see it too. You tried to come to me, wading across the pond, on your converse. Tides were against you as you splashed your legs on your clean water. Nature was surreal, beautiful. Trees, breeze, autumn daylight, and your beautiful image. I just kept on staring at you..and before I could see how the pupa would emerge, before you could reach the other side of green water, the alarm set up.

blah bah.

Drippin fire droplets, merging, forming rivulets, burning everything that comes across its way, melting the ashes, erasing traces, fingerprints, and then everything has to start allover again.. and again it drips, streams, cascades to evaporate the blue sky into dusky grey, helter-skelter everywhere, fire dripping on its way. Something flows from down to up, defies gravity, and ppl try to pull it down, they feel something drippin on them, pure. Fire sprinklers, rivers turn into sea and ocean, ocean fills up the sky, gravity and the counterpart – center of mass dissolute into an energy being of pure emotion, unable to handle , it evaporates and falls up , little children wonder how the sky got blue and the sun got golden and why they can't get a cloud so that they cud fly up to collect stars. They grow hairs and they lose heart. And something has to fall upon them. These droplets collect at the infinity, channel through the black hole, gurgle, walk across time, feed dimensions, fill space with colors, and makes us want to knit with the strings we can never know about.

HOME..

Lord, may I be where my heart lives
Where stars snow upon mountain curves
Where yaks and goats dart across the field
Searching for the highland herbs

Where morning wakens the golden sun
Blushing at the beauty hill
A holy prayer a baby learns
As he yawns for the world to feel

Brothers take cattle to graze
Laughing through the forest trees
Following the water ways
Cuddling with the mountain breeze

Papa takes to city near
Milk of yak, curds and cheese
To buy those dolls for sister dear
Lord, may I go with papa please?

In the dusk then friends gather
Searching pretty girls to tease
Who come to fetch spring water
Would smile in shy so no one sees

And at night a mother sings
Ancient hymn of moon and stars
A baby in her lap then dreams
Of a land he lived so far.

what is yo wish?

To Dear Santa,

I want to bring a change. I don’t know how, but I have this inner desire to bring a change. Make lives better. Help human kind to build a utopia. I don’t know how. But I want to do it. And I think I can.

May be all these stuffs run into my mind coz I watch a lot of cartoons and maybe I want to emulate those anime heroes, their tales of sacrifices, etc. I even have the name of the organization that I’ll have as a basis for all the people to work together for the same. Binomialblunder. Nothing has to do with the name, just focus on the work.

I hope I’ll get enough wisdom and also keep on learning as I grow up to bring the change. I want to stop war, poverty, crimes. I want every little children of the earth to have a happy future. I want every old age to die with a smile on face. I want to die with a smile on my face. I want to live with smile on all faces. I want Osama and Obama playing golf in North Korea. No need for armies, police, war. No orphans, no bombs, no sadness. No children beating stones to feed their families.
I believe I can, with your help.

I don’t know if I’ll have the same feelings once I get rich and powerful. I want to be very rich and powerful.i want to have friends and brothers whom I can trust who can and who would help me to make this world better.

I want to experience everything to gain wisdom. I want to feel the air when I fall hard and I want to feel the air when I go high. I want to know the difference in that same air. I want to deny the seduction and defy fear, trample on hopelessness. I want to be powerful enough and wise enough to do what I want to do. Power corrupts. I don’t know if I’ll just go on vacation in Hawaii and forget the pain in this world.

Meat is good but It hurts to watch the killing. Still, meat is power. I can’t give up on it.

Please give goodness to every children of today and the future tomorrow.

Pond of sadness
Lord, teach us to swim in it
Give us warmth in cold
And shade in heat
Well of goodness
Lord, let us drink in it
Give us smiles on faces
And wings in feet

i wonder..

don't like anything, want everything, hollow deepest space.. miss nothing coz nothing was there to miss in the first place, every time shit happens and i struggle to wipe my ass..


i wonder what a virus thinks! i wonder if there are organisms that has a life span of nano seconds..i wonder if those organisms live in the world of atoms.. i wonder if god can conceive the amount of big bangs going inside our heads..i wonder if we can really see the ripples of gravitation making and breaking lives..i wonder if god is sure abt what he is doing..i wonder if steels and chairs breathe air of their own..i wonder if bad is good in the other world..i wonder if a god thinks..

..

and what do i see in my dream? just another dream....
all promises made up in whim are just another whim........

..

felt like that when i was a teenager
turned myself to a star-gazer
now a bit matured..a bit stronger..
still i stay with the stars a bit longer...

..

thorns remain, roses come and go.

........

you r the one
who makes my heart beat
you r the one
who makes it hard to breathe...

no matter how much i dream
it's still the same
pretending not to kno u
when they call your name
tell me girl..
how many hearts u've broken

those simple words that said so much
that u missed me and to keep in touch
were all just words u said to yo frens
tell me girl..
how many hearts u've broken again...

girl you make the mountains sway
my heart is just a feather
still I m feeling blue
in this sunny weather..

coz no matter how much I dream
it’s still the same
pretending not to kno u
when they call your name
tell me girl..
how many hearts u’ve..

HEART FRACTURE

this feeling like when u don't breathe for a while
but u still somehow manage to smile
virtual happiness fades in slow
dreams lost between pillow
that spark when she spoke to you
the same old world but the feelings so new
blooming roses in autumn deserts
beating hearts in morning dew
that feeling like when u don't breathe for a while
but still u cant stop to smile

those simple words that made your day
painted blood for hearts of clay
soft smiles to set your free
sweeter than the shade of tree
all but now a dust in vision
the same old world creating illusion
dying air from ocean waves
breaking hearts in spring season
this feeling like when u don't breathe for a while
but u still somehow manage to smile

blue skies that wind and rain
silly smiles to cover up yo pain
crowded laughter slowly fades
silence like the winter blades
that feeling when sun brushed her face
garden lily swayed in her grace
night stars from mountain top
falling down in warm embrace
that feeling like when u cant breathe for a while
but now a past to look back and smile..